Vanessa-Value
“There is nothing you can do that would make God love you any more or any less.” Through these words, for the first time, I was able to recognize the true voice of my Father. Growing up I chose to believe that if I worked hard enough, pleased the people around me, and met their expectations, I would have a happy life. I believed I would be able to fill the hole in my heart that desired to feel loved and cared for by “doing”. Whether it was aiming to be the best daughter, a good friend, at the top of my class, or the best swimmer on my team, I realized my sense of well-being depended entirely on my performance. I struggled to find purpose in my life and began to believe maybe there wasn’t one.
When I got to college I was invited by a friend to go to a small group in Chi Alpha. Even though I didn’t know what small group was I knew I wanted to have a “fresh start” and new friends sounded like a good starting line. It was almost foreign to hear and see college students just like myself speak about Jesus, worship Him, and display a life full of joy I knew I didn’t have. They talked about God like they knew Him, how sin hurts His heart, and that it has consequences. I believed that God existed to make me happy and that if I was a good person I’d go to heaven.
I started to really hear the gospel for the first time and realized my biggest problem wasn’t the disapproval of the people around me. The Lord gently revealed to me that the obstacle to knowing my true purpose was my selfishness. I was my own king instead of Jesus, who provides perfect righteousness for us. My small group leader and friends in small group loved and showed me the true nature and character of God. They loved me without expecting anything in return, they listened eagerly, they were self-giving and showed me the never-changing love Jesus has for us. Through this for the first time my eyes were opened to the cross, I repented and believed in the gospel. As I turned my life and will over to Jesus, I found the love I had been seeking. A love that changes souls, gives life purpose, and is the ever-faithful love we all long for. Jesus showed me my life has value because He made it, and He values me. That friends, is more than enough, and He extends the same love to you.